Phone sex can be a hot way to have sex with someone, like a Tinder match or former college classmate, without ruining the fantasy. Sometimes certain people or situations are only hot in fantasy.
Another option: Look to your partner for language cues
Unless you’re also a sex writer or sex educator, chances are you’ve never asked someone (or been asked yourself) what body part words they like. So if your partner gives you a non-answer to the above, there’s an alternative: Listen to how they reference their own bods.
Chances are at some point your partner is going to let you know they’re [verbing] their [noun]. Keep track of what those verbs and nouns are, and use them when you’re describing what you’re doing to their [noun].
Read erotica
What could be a better way to up your dirty dictionary entries than with some page porn? Either opt for shorter, online stories from sites like Sugar Butch Chronicles and Aurore, or read a full-on erotic novel.
Here are some A+ erotica novels that aren’t “Fifty Shades of Grey”: “The Boss” by Abigail Barnette, “The Club” by A.L. Brooks, “No Limits” by Lori Foster, or “Diary of a Submissive” by Sophie Morgan.
Listen to audio erotica
Like reading erotica, listening to it exposes you to verbs, nouns, and adjectives you can borrow for your own erotic scenes during phone sex. Plus, it’ll get you used to hearing the oh-so-hot phrases. Some popular audio erotica sites and apps: Dipsea, Quinn or Girl on the Net.
Put on porn… but don’t watch it
Just listen. CrashPadSeries is an especially good (paid) porn site for learning consent-based, pleasure-focused phrases.
Set the scene
Even if you never plan to introduce video to your sex sesh, you need to limit distractions. If you’re paying attention to the cat or checking the email notification that just popped up on your phone, your partner will sense that you’re preoccupied.
Here are steps for set up: Flip your phone to Do Not Disturb mode, and turn off all other technology, Clean your room, Set the space to a comfortable temp, Put your pleasure props in an easy-to-reach place, Play tunes, avoiding sites that play commercials, Light candles and dim or the lights.
Mutually masturbate
Shed your skivvies and reach between your legs. Or, grab your fave buzzy buddy. Then, with your phone in one hand and your junk or toy in the other, have at it! Phone sex doesn’t have to be elaborate. Listening to the sounds and moans of the other person moaning can be arousing without much other talking.
